Firstly, I have nothing against opera. Clearly the performers are very talented people and I have great respect for that. But there’s a special place you have to be in to really enjoy opera, and pretty much any amount of self-awareness takes you far from it. And on top of that, when you add poorly translated subtitles, a fat Rodolpho (I know, right?), and some guy’s watch alarm going off (for precisely 60 seconds) at the exact moment Mimi drops her muff, it becomes much harder for me to maintain proper opera composure.